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A life without purpose is no life at all

April 2, 2017

artistswayI can’t remember where I heard this quote about purpose, or even if I’m quoting it right, but it has stuck with me over the years especially as I re-evaluate my life as one needs to do periodically. For me this latest round of self evaluation has come because I’m approaching a Big Birthday. 40 to be exact. And like most people hitting an age milestone, I’m thinking what the hell have I been doing with my life? What am I going to be doing with my life for the next 40 years? Needless to say these train of thoughts have led to some anxiety-ridden conversations with myself and friends as I try to unpick and unpack my life.

I’ve been going through The Artist’s Way, a book/creative course by Julia Cameron. If you haven’t heard of it, or tried it, I do recommend that you do. The whole purpose is to connect you back with your creative self and release you from being a blocked artist. Going through the exercises, has been tough but really rewarding as I try to understand what has led me to become blocked in the first place and the excuses I use to avoid stepping out and pursuing my creative dreams. I won’t say that now I’m about ready to drop a best selling novel, but I will say that I know and believe that it’s possible and I’m prepared to make the changes in my life to make it happen.

Of course, all this hasn’t come without a spiritual and emotional dimension. I’m realising just how much faith it’s taking and challenging of mind sets, attitudes and negative beliefs (all my own!) that I’m having to undo. It’s exhausting but rewarding  work, especially when you have a breakthrough however small. One of mine was during a week of reading deprivation. Yes you read that right. A week of no reading. Which seems counterproductive, especially for me considering that I run a small book review blog, and the written word is one of the ways in which I express myself creatively as well as relax. But during that, oh so long week, I realised how much I used reading as an excuse or a distraction from actually doing things, and moreover, a distraction from confronting or dealing with issues in my life. Before the thought of arriving on the train or early to meet a friend for coffee without a book in hand was a level of anxiety that I thought I could never deal with. It still bothers me now but not as much because I know there’s other things I could be doing that might be more productive. Or even just pursuing another activity that I previously wouldn’t have done, like going for a walk, learning a new skill. Or writing this blog post.!

I have a way to go before I’ve  figured out my life and what I’m going to do with it, but I know I’m on the right track and I’m intending to enjoy the journey.

From → Faith, Life

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